Sometimes when putting Courtney to bed I lay there a while after she falls asleep just enjoying the peaceful innocence of a sleeping child. She doesn’t stay still long so when she sleeps, I get to enjoy the stillness. When I have a lot on my mind regarding her needs, I lay there hoping that through osmosis, she will give me some type of hint on how to tackle whatever is on my mind. I have found myself a few times whispering the question, “Courtney how do you want me to handle this”? Tonight I asked her if she is happy in her class, I asked her if I should still be fighting for something different. Of course she never answers and of course I don’t get any answers through osmosis. So I’m left with the job of figuring out how to handle it myself.
Tomorrow we meet with her team again. We are meeting to review how this placement is working out. Reports say she is happy and doing well. Pictures show her playing next to friends and looking like she is enjoying herself. Of course that makes me happy. The problem is, based on a home team member’s observation, Courtney is a passive participant who needs a lot of prompting to actually be an active participant.
I was talking to a colleague and she was talking about how inclusion works in another district. She discussed how children like Courtney are in a regular classroom. Basically, they are just part of the class while the instruction they are receiving is completely different than their peers. I don’t want Courtney just to be a passive participant. I want her to be engaged. School is not just about making friends and learning from them.
So I need Team Courtney to cheer us on again tomorrow. Not sure what I’m looking to get out of this meeting, but do know that I still am not satisfied.