Comparing your child to others…we all do it at some point. Especially in the early years when you are watching your child and the children around them reach different milestones.
As a special needs mom, early on I had to work hard at not comparing as I watched kids Courtney’s age and even her own little sister surpass her quickly. I definitely don’t do it as much now. Courtney is where she is suppose to be for Courtney. Doesn’t matter where anyone else her age is at.
But…then there are those moments. Today was one of those moments. We were at my family’s Thanksgiving gathering. My nephew and his wife were there with his 17 month old daughter. We don’t get to see them much at all so it was the first time really seeing all the little skills she’s gaining. Her mom, dad and Aunt were asking her to point to her eyes, nose, feet and so on. It was adorable. But the cuteness turned bittersweet for me. At 17 months she is doing a skill that my 6 year old is still working very hard at trying to master.
It stung and sometimes I just need to acknowledge that feeling instead of beating myself up for feeling this way. I removed myself from the area and a little later I vented via text to a friend. She reminded me of something very important. She reminded me to focus on the skills that Courtney has mastered and how hard she worked to achieve those skills. She is so right.
Courtney works her little tail off 7 days a week. There is not one day during the week where she doesn’t have therapy and or school. Most kids her age had at least 3 days off this past week. Courtney was off school but 2 of those 3 days she still had therapy. Has she mastered pointing to body parts? No but she is working incredibly hard to and I couldn’t be more proud of her!
I’m sure I will always experience these bittersweet moments. It’s part of being an autism mom. The other part of being an autism mom is getting to celebrate each and every skill she works hard to master.