Today was filled with some cool moments and some pretty rough moments. We have officially hit the point where Courtney is starting to act out due to the change in ALL routines. During summer break we at least have the routine of therapies both at clinic and at home. She also still has several weeks where she has the routine of summer school. During winter break we at least have co distant I’m home therapies. During spring break again, we have the consistency of the home therapies. During COVID-19 break, as of this week, we are 2 weeks into no school and now have lost the consistency of both in-home and clinic based therapies. All three things that help ground her have either have been stripped from her or changed drastically. There are now bruises, bite marks and scratches on all 4 of us to show how much this is effecting her.

I really try hard to stay positive. There’s a few people that have heard from me in the midst of some of the hardest moments these past 2 weeks but I try to make it just that, a vent then I try to move forward. Today I was sure I was going to lose it. Every effort I took to complete e-learning in the morning was met with lots of resistance by both girls. The afternoon didn’t start off much better. After watching Courtney bite herself several times I decided to give up on the e-learning and do our new favorite quarantine activity. “Pool” time for the win!

Everyone was much happier after the “swim” break so I decided to brave some activities once again but I decided to repeat ones I knew they enjoyed the first time. Taking turns with a puzzle while labeling letters was a huge success again! I then worked on counting. Mommy win!

A co-worker reminded me today that at school when a child isn’t regulated, we usually reduce the demand some how. No sense challenging them when they aren’t regulated enough to perform. She is right…I have to remember that. It’s not about how much of the e-leaning we get through. It’s about surviving this insanely confusing and scary time and being happy!