Some of my family members do a zoom call every evening. We joke how my participation is fleeting since I’m trying to manage the chaos in my house while chatting but no matter how chaotic I won’t miss it. There’s usually a chosen topic of the call. Topics range from trivia games, bingo, favorite something or something more thought provoking like, what is something “good” during this crazy time. That was last night’s topic. Last night I actually had difficulty coming up with something though I did and it truly is something I have been enjoying. Tonight, though, the “good” really hit me. But first let me recap the day…
Today was really hard. I mean REALLY hard! Both girls were in nasty moods. Courtney was very aggressive to both herself and me. We actually had an appointment today to get her fitted for a special needs stroller. (More on that to come.) We went to get in the car to head to our appointment and Courtney decided she wanted nothing to do with getting in the car. It took both Joe and I to carry her screaming, scratching and kicking body to the car and both of us to get her in. Her fight or flight was so high her strength was unreal. There was no buckling her so we gave in. We rescheduled our appointment.
Courtney is really thrown off by all of this as the whole world. What this does to a child like Courtney who thrives on a routine is unimaginable at times. I made it my goal this week to structure up things. So far it’s not working but things like this take time.
I let today get the best of me. I even got snippy over text message with friends from work. Thankfully, I have some awesome co-workers. One even let me cry with her.
Then came bedtime. The day left me feeling defeated. Out of nowhere Courtney decided to climb on my lap and snuggle with me. Alyssa, in a jealous manner, joined in. Soon it turned into tickles and climbing all over me. So there it is. There is the “good” in all of this. The girls are my “good”. Their innocence. Their smiles. Their laughter. Today was awful but in the end, they made me smile!