When the egg shells disappear..,

I’ve been going back and forth on if I wanted to share an update. Part of me is worried that this update may be too personal. Then I realized the exact reason why I couldn’t decide is actually the reason I should share the update. So here I go….

I’ve shared a lot recently about Alyssa’s anxiety. I’m not talking about a little anxiety when I leave her side, not the anxiety some may feel when trying something new. I’m talking about anxiety that runs your life. The type anxiety that makes you feel sick most of the day. The type of anxiety that causes your whole body to shake and have struggles breathing. The type of anxiety that leaves egg shells around the house and makes everyone wonder when they are going to step on one.

We tried so many different strategies with Alyssa. All the strategies did was escalate a panic attack. It was hard to watch her struggle so much. As her mom I had to take the next step. Medication. There yo go. I said it. I decided to medicate my 6 year old. To be honest, when making this decision, I was more worried about what people would think about me giving her medication than the medication itself.

I’m glad I was able to look past the stigma and do what was best for Alyssa. The past two weeks the egg shells we were walking on have disappeared. The “my tummy feels funny” phrase that we were hearing from her more times than we can count have basically stopped. The shakes, the tears, the irrational fears have diminished to almost none. There’s calmness in our house again. I truly believe Courtney was also feeling Alyssa’s anxiety and she can now feel the difference as she seems a little less anxious. I’ve noticed changes in behavior that I didn’t even realize were related to her anxiety. The past 2 weeks I have slowly gotten my little girl back.

I completely understand why it can be scary to try medication. We tried medication with Courtney 2 years ago and it didn’t go well at all. We’ve experienced the scary side. Now we’ve seen the positive side. We couldn’t be more thrilled to be sweeping up the egg shells instead of stepping on them. We couldn’t be more thrilled to have our little girl back.

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