All I wanted was us to do it as a family.

Instead I got Courtney and I in the checkout area for 30 minutes.

All I wanted was us to do it as a family.

Instead I got a child too overwhelmed to try something different.

All I wanted was us to do it as a family.

Instead I did get to see how there is some acceptance and compassion at lifetime. Thank you staff for trying to cheer on Courtney as we tried to get her past the lobby.

All I wanted was us to do it as a family.

But I did learn that using Courtney’s special stroller helps tremendously for those transitions into new places.

All I wanted was us to do it as a family.

So why don’t we use the stroller more? Because it causes Alyssa great jealousy.

All I wanted was us to do it as a family.

But instead the difficulty of being a special needs sibling reared it’s ugly head. It caused tears and mean things to be said. Things that no matter how much I tell myself it was a little 6 year old with big emotions, it still stings.

“I hate having an autism sister.”

“I wish I didn’t have a sister.”

“Sometimes I think you hate me.”

Words that I know she doesn’t mean but words that will be hard to forget.

All I wanted was us to do it as a family but instead I now wish I could take back all that happened.

Alyssa Jeanne, I love you with all my heart and nothing will ever change that!